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On Minimization as a Patriarchal Reflex
The Other can’t have feelings so long as I don’t own mine
(First published in 2017.)
I posted a brief note to Facebook about starting to learn what is painfully obvious to women:
At best, patriarchy can inflict the stress of constant bodily vigilance and at worst: acute terror.
The post took off and the comments were stunning. So many stood out, like those from women who reported on strategies for increasing safety in taxis. One commenter wrote that she always video-chats with a friend while she’s alone in an Uber, dropping details that signal to the driver that someone knows where they are.
If men don’t know about this kind of defensive labour, they’ve got to learn. Like white people have to learn about “The Talk”.
One genre of comments sent me down a real rabbit hole. The commenter would start with congratulations about my sensitivity to this kind of thing, because the…
